“Help, we’re all going to d… Wha… Oh, excuse me, it seems my system is no longer up-to-date - [old memory status deleted] - so, much better… WELCOME to the Spacebase Startopia! I’m VAL, your helpful and efficient Space Station AI! According to my records, this Station hasn’t been used at all in the last 17 years! How very strange. Furthermore, it would appear that you are the only rational life form in this Sector. Well then, CONGRATULATIONS! I hereby officially pronounce you Commander of…